★★★★ ☆ It’s morphine, silly. It’s all about morphine. This new pop biopic by director Baz Luhrmann soon sinks into a drip of morphine and never realistically returns tonal. The opioid pulsates in the arms of legendary music director Colonel Tom Parker, played by Tom Hanks under gallons of latex as a cross between Rumpelstiltskin and Fat Bastard of Austin Powers.
We are in the year 1997, and the colonel is on his deathbed, and he sets the rule for his relationship with his most famous client. “I didn’t kill Elvis,” Parker says, through Hanks ’European cod delivery (Parker was Dutch, Franco-German Hanks). “I did Elvis!”
Tom Hanks and Austin Butler to Elvis
ALAMY
And, whoosh, another shot of morphine and down the pipe, for