It breaks my heart that seven players from my former club Manly refuse to wear rainbow shirts to celebrate inclusion. This is a difficult conversation we need to have and I’m here for it. Let me make my way to chat with these players. I’m trying not to get mad.
As for me, I’m a proud gay man. It was never a choice I made. I was born gay, I’ve lived gay, and I’m proud to proclaim that I’m gay. But it was hard, early on, and if there’s anything that motivates me to speak in this conversation, it’s knowing that there are still so many young people who are suffering because of their own sexuality, and what I really want at the end of this. the conversation is for them to be stronger, to know that they are not alone, that they are not abnormal, that they have support.
Ian Roberts during his playing days at Manly in the 1990s and, inset, the club’s pride shirt. Credit: Getty Images, supplied
So to the Manly club, thank you for the shirt initiative. Your heart was in the right place and you operated from a place of love. We need more initiatives exactly like this and it is through these actions that we change the world.
Sport is political and can change the world, as Olympian Peter Norman did by supporting Black Power salutes, as did Nicky Winmar, as did Cathy Freeman. This is our turn.
Yes, Manly, there has been a backlash to your actions on the shirt, but that doesn’t change the fact that your intentions were good.
To Des Hasler, the Manly manager and my former teammate, you couldn’t have done more. You supported me when I came out as gay a long time ago, even though you knew before that, and you’ve supported me ever since. This must be very difficult for you, and I appreciate how you have gone out of your way to fix it.
Thanks to everyone in the gay community who has contacted me about this, and I understand your outrage. I feel a little bit of it too, but we have to contain it. We need to keep having this conversation. We’ve come this far, and the only way to move forward in situations like this is to keep moving forward without giving way to too much anger. We have to make people like these players understand that we are not a threat, that we are people like them.
To the NRL, I confess my disappointment. You’ve been so strong in so many areas, and never more so than in 2017 when you had Macklemore sing Same Love at the grand finale. I’ll never forget the 80,000 NRL fans singing along. As I told NRL CEO Todd Greenberg immediately afterwards: “This will save lives!”